Thunderous Sky

Lightning flashing quick

Outside my window now

Yellow sparks do fly

Yearbook Memories

Distant memories of people past
Days, hours, minutes that did not last
Time didn't wait for us to grow
Life moved on so long ago.

Pictures fade--the words begin to disappear
Emptiness in frames hollow and clear,
Stare back at us in solemn woe
Life moved on so long ago

I Know Why

I know why the caged bird sings
Why the steel constricts so heavily around
And the weight of the air on delicate wings
Rubs away at their softness--tightly bound
To suppress the worry of unadorned kings
Who cage beauty because they are not crowned
And the bird's song is the gem they seek,
The treasure they possess, but cannot keep.

I know why her wings will not break,
Why in the midst of ruin she will always rise--
In fear she will not fold, she will not quake
For the strength of God is buried in her eyes
And the sound of her song soothes her wake;
Let not the coming darkness be a surprise,
When the last rays of light caress her battle scars
As the sun sets, fading between these metal bars...

Actions of Change

This solitary action
The root and cause of change
This solitary action
Born of idealism, careless and free
A consequence whether by chance or fate
Announced grandly, not a moment late
This solitary action.

Belle--as discussed here--finally made it's way to a city near me.
At the end, I couldn't help but wonder, if the Admiral hadn't gotten a slave pregnant,
if the slave hadn't died, if Dido hadn't come to stay with the Lord Chief Justice...
Would he have ever thought twice about the value of the life of slaves?
See more info on the history of this story here. The painting above is of Dido and her cousin.

Crossing the T's and Dotting the I's

The fun (and burden) of poetry is when you re-read a poem and realize it completely captured a moment or idea (or that it didn't quite hit the mark). Last month I wrote "Heavier than Steel, Lighter than a Feather" but it didn't quite feel right. After submitting it for a critique and reading some of the comments I decided to do some editing and make some improvements. Perhaps next month, I'll look back and think this is exactly right (or maybe I'll edit it again).

Artwork by MechanicalHyena and found on deviantArt.

Heavier than Steel, Lighter than a Feather

They told me I was broken:

My arms unable to survive

And I heard them crank the saw--

Caught the glimmer of it's silvery blade,

Braced myself for the sound of pain,

Readied myself for the loss of flesh--

Dead weight can only hold you down...

So I laid there,
Drowning in my own tears.

Anticipating the loss from which I could not heal.

Time stretches on

Agonizing--

And the sound of the saw fades--

Chances We Take

Close my eyes
And there I am--somewhere
Blue green seas and
Sandy shores--somewhere.

I don't know
But I like it.

The relaxing winds
Watch my hair blow
As waves pass me by
As the sun journeys across the sky.
All is calm, all is well--
Until the sound of cannons
Breaks the peace.

Warm sand against
Quickly moving feet;
I'm rushing back to safety
To a place I think I know...
A little cave hidden away
Somewhere--my brain is leading
And I follow in fear
Of unknown villains--
Unknown faces, unknown demons.

Lights Under the Sky

Meteors fall between stars,
Bright lights shinning above me

Image by fksr on Flickr. Click here for more info.

And in the distant dark
Eerie sounds descend with the fire
Perfect for a midnight scare.
In the midst of steady chirps,
Louder than whippoorwill calls--
Somewhere in the distance
Calling out to passers by;
She exists out there,
Without form or shape...
No one knows her purpose,
No one knows her name,
Just the sound of her voice
Beneath falling stars
And the echo of her scream
Vibrating between passing cars.

Scared Stranger

He hides from me,
Afraid I'll destroy his world...
He creeps into a tiny hole,
Retreats in to the dark
To escape the ferocity
He thinks I possess...

Echo of the Firework

Staring out the window

Out into the city lights,

Watching the colors burst

Higher, in the black of the night--

Bright sparkles falling fast,

Each chemical burns bright, 

Should I or Should I Not Say?: The Censorship of Words

Backstory

Last summer, I realized Eve released a new album. Eve being one of the few artists I listen to that when I see that little "E" next to the album, I actually wonder if every song is going to sound like $#&! %$#* @*$!.  But I noticed Missy Elliott was featured in a song and was so excited to see two of favorite female MCs back at it, I bought it.

The "E," which denotes explicit content, is the MP3 equivalent of the parental advisory labels that appear on CDs. Except, nothing stops me from buying the explicit content online. I'm sure there are switches parents can check, but I'm also pretty sure their kids know more about getting around that than the parents know about actually setting the feature...

Anyway, I give the album a listen and am shocked when I hear the b word in the middle of the chorus. Immediately, I assume I downloaded the wrong version by accident, but when I double check, it is in fact the clean version! To prove to myself I wasn't crazy, I searched my music for an older Eve song--"Gangsta B's (featuring Da Brat and Trina)"--from her Scorpion album which was released in 2001. As I surmised, the b word is bleeped out every time on the edited song. I've notice lately, the only words record labels consider explicit now are apparently the n word and the f word. O_o

A large number of my Christian friends are against the idea of listening to secular music in general. Two of those friends have already written well thought out posts on the topic:

1. Hear No Evil, See No Evil, Speak No Evil -- by FantasticFo
2. Beware the evils lurking in our music -- by Danyelle Davis. 

I agree with every thing these ladies have said, but as a writer my ideas on censorship of words get a little more complex. 

The Hardest Thing

Sometimes the truth,
     the very idea manifesting
Deep within the cells of my mind--
Easy to push away,
     write off with unconcerned glee
Becomes impossible to ignore...

Slowly.

The truth grows and swells,
Pushing at the seams of my skull,
Conquering my very subconscious.
It escapes,
     seeping into the atmosphere willingly
So quick to disappear, from me
To make itself known
To the world.

So Many Good Things

So many good things
Converging
Anticipation of the next thing
And nothing goes wrong--
     but it has to...
I doubt the reality
In fear of losing.
You see,
Failure and success go

Wild Thing

Wild thing,
Atop my head
Shimmying down 
In bouncing coils...
Defiant and untameable
You grace the world.
Proud in your wildness
Stubborn in your curl.

Wild thing,
Craves my attention,
Devours the world's water
Only to become a desert:
You struggle to meet

Mastermind of Villainy

A master of disguise,
He lingers, hiding in plain sight,
Neighbor, friend, and confidant
He convinces the world to see
Distorted views of reality.
Deceiving the world with ease and haste--
He creates polarity:

TimeTraveler

The threads of time unravel,
The fabric comes apart
And in his mind
He sees a way to depart...

Writer's Block

The words are there,
Like magma,
     hot and red, oozing
Through the core of my mind.
The pressure builds,

Beautiful Humility

To be aware is not to be weak--

To admit your fault and make amends,

And if in the end you humbly bow

It doesn't mean you've lost,

Succumbed to higher authorities

But grown strong in your resolve

Talk to Me

Talk to me--
Say anything you'd like
Let loose repressed anger
Or express the joys of your life,
Anything...
I'm waiting on your words,
Insight to your innermost workings
And the chance to see inside--

Words To My Mother

I don't want to thank you today

For yesterday's best effort,

Or for last year's sacrifice.

I don't want to tell you I care

Just this once, for occasion

And never say it again...

The Water Never Stands Still

Wufengci Waterfall in Taiwann.
Image and more information can be found here

The water never stands still

Never runs back to visit
    to risk tearing open old wounds
    for a peak at what once was--
         perhaps it will be again...

But water can only look forward.

Life of a Grad Student

Is there
A light at the end of
Some metaphorical tunnel
I'm walking through blindly?
Is it
Just over the horizon
Waiting to see my face?

Missed Opportunities

Some other day
I might have stopped for a chat,
Pulled up a chair,
Gazed out at the world
And opened myself to conversation...

We might have smiled
Shared ice cream cones--
Watched the sun bathe the sky
In shades of orange and pink
While we talked and shared
Connecting one life to another life.

Restoration of Change

Everything is different,
The world I live in
    has passed away
Reborn--
I am here,
Defenseless and unsure

Breathing Under Water

Beautiful myths treading water:

The sea's unloved fairy--

Gills glowing beneath waves

Swimming in oceans blue...

Breathing, there, under water

Obscured by mermaid tales

Beautifully rare and wild

Silence's own misunderstood creature.

The Definition of Life

I was browsing a book of poems I wrote in high school and the title of one caught my eye. I decided to write a new poem based solely on the title and compare what ideas were conveyed. I thought it would be great to see how much changed in my writing both ideally and stylistically over the course of 10 (yes 10!) years. 

The Definition of Life (pt 2)

May 5, 2014

I see the world with my own eyes
and oft forget my eyes cannot see
The shades and hues of colors here
Glow differently from you to me--
And as they take flight in gentle winds,

From a Caterpillar to a Butterfly

The garden was overgrown--
A caterpillar's luxurious haven,
A breeding ground for weeds,
And a place for crows to peck...
Where beauty and opportunity lie

The Story of a Lifetime

A while back, I saw the preview for a movie called Belle. It was supposed to be a period piece about the first (or rather the first recorded) black aristocrat. The story of a little girl born of an African slave and a British naval officer, Belle follows the life of Dido Elizabeth Belle. Part love story, part a view of the history we never learn, the trailer of the movie easily intrigued me. I added it to my list of movies to watch out for, but I never saw anything else about it.

Waiting for the World to End

I couldn't wait
     for permanent teeth to grow,
For school to start and recess begin--
Couldn't wait for middle school:
     awkward dances and basketball games
To go through puberty, to be an adolescent,
Then I couldn't wait to turn sixteen--
Get my license, a car, a job, and responsibility.
There was eighteen, college, and twenty-one.

Childhood Days

Ice cream dripping,

And the fizz of soda bubbling--

Cold melting together

Under the heat of the summer sun...

The smooth taste of cream

Undermined by the spark of soda

And the bubbles tickle my nose.

The sweet smell of vanilla burning

While the clouds move in, rolling--

Another summer day spent.